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Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

AYAH!!!!

I received this in an email from a friend... Enjoy the joke :)


A man came home from work and his children ran to him and called out ‘Ayah ! Ayah !’.

His neighbor got very upset and said to him, “Can you please tell your children not to call you ‘Ayah’ ?”

The man asked, “Why?”

The neighbor retorted, “Because my children call me ’Ayah’ too. They might get confused and mistake you to be their father."

Marina M might say... the father not confident?



~xoxo~
ShAuNnY BoY:P ~

Saturday, November 7, 2009

jokes

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.


Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.


I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.


But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it' s not only the passion...Dad, she's pregnant.


Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.


Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.


In the meantime we will pray that science finds a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.


Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.


Love, Your Son John



PS. Dad, none of the above is true.. I'm over at Tommy's house.


I just wanted to remind you there are worse things in life than the Report Card in my desk drawer.


I love you.


Call me when it's safe to come home.


~xoxo~
ShAuNnY BoY:P ~

Monday, August 31, 2009

I CAN READ IT! CAN YOU ?

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too.
Cna yuo raed tihs?

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!








~xoxo~
ShAuNnY BoY:P ~

Friday, July 10, 2009

bible jokes

Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?
A. Ruthless.

Q. What do they call pastors in Germany ?A. German Shepherds.Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A. Noah He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out alittle prophet.

Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David's Triumphwas heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostleswere all in one Accord.

Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.

Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden ?
A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around Jordan . The banks were always overflowing.

Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.

Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of Nun.

Q. Why didn't they play cards on the Ark ?
A. Because Noah was standing on the deck. ( Groan...)


PS... Did you know it's a sin for a woman to make coffee?
Yup, it's in the Bible. It says . . . "He-brews"


~xoxo~
ShAuNnY BoY:P ~

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Are you a Physics major ????

Are you a Physics major?

Due to the enormous workload involved in physics classes combined with stress and lack of sleep, physics students often forget (either by accident, defense mechanism, or intentionally) what their major really is.

Thus, as a physics major, I took it upon myself to create a small list of indicators to help us all remember what we really are.

YOU MIGHT BE A PHYSICS MAJOR...

if you have no life - and you can PROVE it mathematically.

if you enjoy pain.

if you know vector calculus but you can't remember how to do long division.

if you chuckle whenever anyone says 'centrifugal force.'

if you've actually used every single function on your graphing calculator.

if when you look in a mirror, you see a physics major.

if it is sunny and 70 degrees outside, and you are working on a computer.

if you always do homework on Friday and Saturday nights.

if you know how to integrate a chicken and can take the derivative of water.

if you think in 'math.'

if you've calculated that the World Series actually diverges.

if you hesitate to look at something because you don't want to break down its wave function.

if you have a pet named after a scientist.

if you laugh at jokes about mathematicians.

if the Humane society has you arrested because you actually performed the Schrodinger's Cat
experiment.

if you can't remember what's behind the door in the science building which says 'Exit.'

if you have to bring a jacket with you, in the middle of summer, because there's a wind-chill
factor in the lab.

if you are completely addicted to PhysLink.com.

if you avoid doing anything because you don't want to contribute to the eventual heat-death of
the universe.

if you consider ANY non-science course 'easy.'

if when your professor asks you where your homework is, you claim to have accidentally
determined its momentum so precisely, that according to Heisenberg it could be anywhere in the universe.

if the 'fun' center of your brain has deteriorated from lack of use.

if you'll assume that a 'horse' is a 'sphere' in order to make the math easier.

if you understood more than five of these indicators.

if you make a hard copy of this list, and post it on your door. If these indicators apply to you,
there is good reason to suspect that you might be classified as a physics major. I hope this clears
up any confusion.


Created by Jason Lisle. Edited by Anton Skorucak of PhysLink.com




~xoxo~
ShAuNnY BoY:P ~

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

can you read this?

Can U read this?

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid, too.
Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe tuo fo 100 anc.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid,
aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,
it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are,
the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae..
The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef,
but the wrod as a wlohe.
Azanmig huh?
yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

Monday, December 1, 2008

what a joke!! comment on marina mahathir's blog

i found this very amusing ... lol ... a comment from Hikayat Mamak Bendahara on Marina Mahathir's blog ... what surprises me is that this blogger is a secondary school teacher


Hikayat Mamak Bendahara said...

Aids?


Isn't this the lab-invented disease which is meant to kill and wipe out Africans?


http://hikayatmamakbendahara.blogspot.com/

MarinaM said...

Mamak Bendahara, if you still believe that nonsense, there is really no hope.


click here
for proof of the above comment.

Hikayat Mamak Bendahara


click here
for proof of the occupation .. >.<

~xoxo~
ShAuNnY BoY:P ~

Friday, October 24, 2008

1-10

Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1, 2, 3, 4,5, 6, 7, 8, 9,10.
Not only did he do it 1 to 10, hedid it again from 10 back to 1.
This is what he cameup with.....

1 day I go 2 climb a 3 outside a house to peep.

Butthe couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down.

The manrushed out and wanted to 5 with me.

I ran until I fell6 and threw up.

So I go into 7-eleven and grabbed some8 to throw at him.

Then I took a 9 and try to stab athim. 10 goodness he run away.

10, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left7-eleven.

Next day I called my boss and told him I was6.

He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4work.

He also asked me to go climb a 3 and jump down.

I don't understand.

I am so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.